Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Germ warfare

One thing that hasn't changed about me is my shockingly horrible immune system. Yes, I am sick, AGAIN.

I have held on the the ability to get not just one germ, but 37 different kinds at the same time and break out into every known illness, I think this time its Ebola with a touch of the Black Plague. I'm almost proud of myself.

If the fevers, chills, shivering, teeth chattering and violent muscle spasms would let me get some real rest I'm sure I would be bragging all day.

And what am I doing about this? Not. One. Damn. Thing.

I mean, besides whining. That I am a champ at. I take Advil or Tylenol every two hours, swapping them off so as to keep the fever down to a level of moderate delirium. I am bleaching down everything I touch at work and not letting people come near me. Toast and tea. And sucking it up and going to work.

But you know what, I CAN. And that fucking rocks the socks. Even when I feel that I am going to fall over and die any second because there is no way I will draw another breath or survive this round of coughing, I am not panicking. I am working. I am taking calls, doing my job and doing it well.. so really? Ebola? Fuck you buddy. I might be skirting death but I feel like I'm fucking bullet proof.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Same as it ever was

"Letting the days go by, let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by, water flowing underground
Into the blue again, after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime, water flowing underground"

Helloooooo internet!!

Sup?

I've missed you. Like a luvah. Like my companion that I spill my dark secrets to, who never judges, always listens to my every word as if I am simply fascinating and then goes the fuck home when I am tired. You are so good that way.

What have I been doing? Well thank you for asking!

Ive been working for a bank, training new bankers, taking phone calls and rocking the mutherfucking house like a boss for over a year now. Living on my own, kids moved out, off my panic meds, working out, losing weight, performing with Drag Kings, dating one of the performers, and keeping busy with concerts, movies, open mic poetry nights (friends who do slam) and comedy. I have been LIVING. Really fucking living. I leave my house EVERY SINGLE DAY.

It has been glorious.

Oh yeah.

And has it all been peaches and cream? No. There have been struggles. Major set backs. Lost loved ones, human and furry. Hard times with the kids, still having hard times with the kids, doing some praying there.. but you know what?

I AM ALIVE.

Even 5 years ago, I wouldnt of said I was living. I was a shell. Now I see me. Every day when I look in the mirror I see more and more of me looking back.

I got a lifetime back in a year, lovely internet.

Once in a lifetime. Same as it ever was.